- Nicki Minaj must intend on surviving financially despite any Catholic never buying her records again
- I'm more and more saddened by the effect reality tv has had on the world. I don't know that it is the only thing that I can pinpoint, but it does make me wonder if everyone competed for attention like this before it came along. Nothing would make me happier than GaGa and Minaj calling a truce. Especially since some Russian wore machine guns on her right arm. I'll just let that last sentence sink in for a minute.
- I don't understand it. Susan loves to watch E!'s coverage of the red carpet. I feel like after an hour of it, that they almost exclusively talked to people who either had a show on their network or asked questions to turn it that way. People say that Seacrest is the next Dick Clark. Dick Clark gave us glorious things like $25,000 Pyramid and American Bandstand. Seacrest gets rich off things like the Kardashians. Remember that. They're his fault...
Here we go:
7:47 - Foo Fighters = Awesome. The fact that a fan in the audience was wearing his sunglasses on the back of his head and an affliction button up shirt appreciates the same music, makes me question the majority of my decisions.
8:00 - Coldplay was pitchy. And it looked like someone covered Chris Martin's piano in a "technicolor money-shot"
8:09 - The Chipotle commercial has me confused with Willie Nelson singing Coldplay's "The Scientist". It still doesn't make me want to eat Chipotle, but it was definitely memorable.
8:15 - Gotta love the Foo Fighters getting all of this recognition.
8:16 - Beach Boys being done by Maroon 5 & Foster the People seemed like they managed to almost put me to sleep. I'm also wondering if Brian Wilson will want go back into his bedroom and do cocaine for another 2 years after seeing what "artists" like Minaj and GaGa have done with music.
8:32 - Stevie Wonder really needs to let go of the hair. It's gone completely on top. I don't understand why he can't see that...
8:34 - No Sir McCartney, no one wants to hear you jazz standard rendition. Play Yesterday, Hey Jude, or basically anything else besides what you're doing now.
8:38 - I'm glad that chris Brown thanked everyone except Rihanna for not pressing charges...
8:48 - Taylor Swift.... Ugh. For those of you who don't know her backstory, the way I have heard it is this: She's from a rich suburb of Nashville, her dad paid for everything and even bought a bunch of her singles on iTunes when she first released so that it would end up being on the top buys list. She was well-liked in high school. Basically, at no point has anyone likely been mean to her in her life. If she and Chad Kroeger from Nickelback had a child, it would undoubted be able to write such shitty pop songs that it would bring about an apocalyptic event like this.
8:59 - Lady Antebellum kills me. Just blah.
9:05 - They just introduced Gwyneth Paltrow as the only Oscar winner to perform with Cee Lo at last year's Grammys. That wins my award for most stunningly specific introduction tidbit.
9:14 - Adele is 23. I have this weird feeling that she's great enough that we'll lose her to the club of 27. (For those that don't know, thats the club of stars that all died at 27. Cobain, Hendrix, Joplin, etc.)
9:19 - Its sad that Glenn Campbell has Alzheimer's and is stopping touring, but every time they show him I can't help, but to think of this
9:32 - Tony Bennett looks like he wants to give Carrie Underwood the best 10-20 seconds oh her life.
9:34 - Bon Iver is pronounced like Eye ver. Didn't realize it was that bad. Also, his acceptance speech confirmed exactly why the hipsters love him so...
9:51 - I just want Questlove to be by friend.
9:56 - There is a weird bit of irony that Dave Grohl was sandwiched between two electronic artists and Chris Brown after his rant on the acceptance speech.
10:00 - That guy had a cool mouse helmet. I have no idea why he wears it, but it was shiny.
10:05 - Nicki Minaj...just....I don't know how I'm supposed to... Geez. What the fuck was that?
Thats it. I cant comprehend anything else. My brain just felt like someone hit it with a taser. Nicki Minaj has ruined my ability to be interested in music. She also managed to alienate anyone with even a slight amount of respect for the Christian religion.